The Characters of Ranma 1/2 belong to Rumiko Takahashi. I wounldn't even think of claiming them
as my own for fear of being hunted alive or thrown to the lions...

        

SECRETS OF MY HEART
Angela Jewell

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        He stands before me in his black tuxedo, his sapphire eyes staring lovingly

into mine.

        It's hard to believe it's happening. I mean, REALLY happening. No

interruptions, no missing groom... everything for once is perfect.

        And the words, all the names he use to call me. I don't think he realized

it at the time... but they hurt.

        Of course they don't anymore. How could they? He's standing here with *ME.*

Not any of his 'cute' fiancees. And this time it's of his own free will.

        But sometimes I can still hear them laughing. The bitter, cruel sounds

haunt me in my dreams.

        They didn't think I could hear them... but I heard them. They mocked me

behind my back... whispering. And after a while... I started to believe what

they said. The lies. It's hard not to; they were conditioning me.

        Uncute. Violent. Thoughtless. Cruel. Unfeminine.

        They all mean the same. They're imperfections. A smudge on a surface that

you continually try to scrub off. But, it's who you are. You can't change

it.

        Of course you can try... but all you're really doing is hiding behind a

mask. Hiding from who you really are.

        Why should I have to conform? Be different? Change? It's all the same to

me. They don't give a damn about anything but themselves. They only belittle

me to make themselves feel good.

        It's jealousy. That's what it is.

        They know that it's me he loves, and it scares them.

        It scares me too.

        And the words... the things they call me still... I can't help but see the

truth in them. Hearing the same thing over and over again starts to have

that affect on a person. You can't help but listen to their side, and after

a while... it all starts to make sense. Like a puzzle you've always tried to

put together but could never finish because of missing pieces. Well...

there's the pieces. They're holding them out to you. Now all you have to do

is take them and place them where they belong.

        So that's exactly what I do, and it doesn't bother me in the least. So what

if they call me violent. I get mad, I act on it. So I use a mallet, Wow! big

deal! None of them can claim to be innocent where violence is concerned.

Spatulas. Ribbons. Bonborries. Poisons. You tell me which is worse.

        Besides, I'm comfortable with who I am. I could care less what THEY think

of me anyway. What HE thinks of me is what counts.

        He slips the ring onto my finger, and I can't help but smile when I notice

his hands are shaking. It helps make the reality of the situation sink in.

I've won. They've lost. A final confirmation that this isn't all a dream.

        God, it better not be a dream... or if it is I don't ever want to wake up.

        The priest looks at us happily as he says the words we've both been longing

to hear, "I now pronounce you man and wife. You may kiss the bride."

        My love releases the long breath he was holding and laughs softly, relief

clear on his face. He doesn't have to say what he's thinking, I'm thinking

the same thing.

        I don't know when it happened, when I fell in love with him. Even when my

head was screaming at me not to, my heart wouldn't listen. 'He'll hurt you'

a part of my mind whispered. 'He's just using you.' another part insisted.

But they were wrong. He wasn't like the others. All the boys that hounded me

at school. He didn't even seem to like me let alone want to marry me.

Perhaps that was one of the reasons I fell in love with him in the first

place...

        As he kisses me I feel lightheaded. The world around me fades away... and I

don't even care! It's just him and me, the way it was meant to be. And at

last I feel complete.

        I'm no longer Tendo Akane. Now, I'm Saotome Akane. I don't know why it took

us so long...

        I'm just glad that in the end, when it mattered the most, I listened to my

heart.

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send all C&C or flames to:

jewellangela@hotmail.com

(I'd prefer not to have to read any flames though)

        Don't worry... I'm still working on the next chapter of THE GAME. (Chapter 7) It'll be

out... well... I'm not sure... whenever I finish it I guess :)